Disclaimer: Star Trek: Voyager is the trademark and sole property of Paramount Pictures. This story is non-commercial and for enjoyment only. No copyright infringement is intended.


AUTHOR: Tayzie

EMAIL: tayzie17@hotmail.com


SUMMARY: Kathryn wants to know if Hawaiian Highjinks and logic mix. A JetC40's April Fool's Day Challenge fic.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is my very first fic so I hope you like it. My deepest thanks to Shayenne for doing the beta, and as always to my two best sisters in JC, JinnyR and Val for their friendship, encouragement and support.


Who Let Kathryn Loose?



Kathryn walked through the doors of her Ready Room and fell into a chair. "That’s it, Tuvok is a dead Vulcan."

Her first officer rolled his eyes and slowly lowered himself into a seated position. "Kathryn, it was just a training drill."

She glared at him. "That was not a training drill, that was a ‘let’s embarrass the captain’ drill. I want revenge."

Chakotay got to his feet and wandered stiffly to the replicator. "Want a coffee?" A groan answered him. "I’ll take that as a yes." He requested a large black coffee, and a tea for himself.

Kathryn sat drinking her coffee and thinking deeply. She suddenly sat up straight. "I have the perfect revenge."


The captain leapt to her feet and doubled over with a moan. "We’ll have an Hawaiian Shirt Day for the senior staff to raise morale," she muttered from near the floor. "Except, on the day Tuvok will be the only one out of uniform."

Chakotay grimaced. He wondered if he could just hide until Kathryn came to her senses. "As in you will issue an order to that effect. Well that will impress Tuvok. Kathryn do you need help to straighten up?"


Chakotay got up and bent over so his face was level with his captain’s. "Just don’t include me in your crazy revenge, okay?"

He turned and limped from the room.


Chakotay exited the turbolift and came face to face with Kathryn. "Tough day?"

She grinned at him. "I am heading for a long soak."

They walked along in companionable silence. Chakotay glanced sideways. "I’m glad you decided to forego your revenge on Tuvok."

She quickened her steps. "I didn’t."

"Sorry, I missed that."

She turned around and looked up into his face. "I didn’t forgo my revenge."

Chakotay looked startled. "I didn’t get any notification about it."

Kathryn turned and started walking briskly towards her room. He hurried to catch up with her. "Kathryn," he called.

The captain ducked into her room with Chakotay hot on her heels.

"Kathryn, have you issued a memo about the Hawaiian Shirt Day?"

"Er, yes."

"Why didn’t I get the memo?"

She walked over and laid a hand on his chest. "You know that if I issued that memo and Tuvok found out, which he will, he would make my life a misery at the next training drill. So I sent it out in your name." She smiled brilliantly at him.

He stood there unimpressed, and thought briefly about strangling his captain. "Wait a moment, you sent it out in my name but when he traces it back it will show your identity."

"Ah, well no. I sent it out with your ID."

"You did what!" Chakotay straightened to his full height and glared at Kathryn. Is the entire senior staff in on this?"

"Well of course they are. Everyone hates Tuvok after a training drill. B’Elanna helped me…," she trailed off realising that this was probably not the best thing to tell him at the moment.

Chakotay turned and strode towards the door. "Great, you have just put me at the top of Tuvok’s hit list. And the rest of the senior staff are at the top of mine," he muttered as he went out.



Chakotay headed for engineering, thoughts of revenge on his mind. First B’Elanna and then Tom. He strode through the doors just in time to see his quarry disappear into a Jeffries tube. He raced across and bellowed up the tube. "B’Elanna, get yourself down here immediately."

B’Elanna froze. Shit, she thought, the captain wasn’t kidding. Chakotay is really, really peeved. She looked up at the rungs above her and then down to where an angry Maquis stood. She weighed her options.

"Don’t even consider it," came a soft voice from below her.

B’Elanna shivered and reluctantly started climbing down the rungs. She reached the bottom, turned and faced one big angry Indian.

He grabbed her arm and dragged her into a corner away from the engineering staff who were looking on and unashamedly eavesdropping. "Are you mad? I spend all my time as first officer trying to keep our captain from implementing her mad ideas, and now you’re helping her. You know Tuvok will find out."

"You of all people know how hard it is to stop the captain once she has decided on a course of action," B’Elanna hissed. "Believe me, Chakotay, we all tried, so it’s pointless going after the rest of the senior staff. Even Seven tried."

"Why didn’t you let me know? I may have been able to sidetrack her from this course."

B’Elanna hit him on the chest. "Believe me, if I could have got away from her for a second I would have."

Chakotay sighed and released her arm. "Well I certainly will be in the shit with Tuvok, seeing as any trace will lead back to me."

She grinned. "Chakotay, you are my oldest friend. If Tuvok is as good as I think he is he will trace the memo back to the correct source. And the captain never even noticed that I embedded her code underneath yours."



Chakotay walked into his office and sat down behind his desk. He had just started going over the crew roster when his door bell rang. "Enter."

Tuvok walked in and stopped in front of the desk. "Commander, I wish to know if this Hawaiian Shirt memo is to be taken seriously? I fail to see the logic in wearing brightly coloured shirts."

Chakotay briefly considered his options. Tell Tuvok the truth and be thrown out an airlock by his irate captain. Support his captain and be in Tuvok’s bad books. Well there was a great choice. He stood up and walked around his desk and stood close to Tuvok. Maquis tactics, he thought. "Yes, Tuvok, the memo is meant to be taken seriously."

Tuvok stood his ground and gave his best Vulcan look. "I see, Commander." He turned and walked to the door. "I wonder, Commander, if you are aware that Vulcans’ have very long memories."



Chakotay arrived early on the bridge on the morning of what had become known by the senior staff as ‘Get Tuvok Day’. Everyone was there except the security officer. Kathryn sat in her command chair with a grin on her face. Chakotay, mistrusting it leant over and whispered in her ear, "What have you done?"

She giggled. "I guessed that Tuvok would wear the staidest shirt he could come up with so I sent him a Hawaiian shirt and more or less couched it as an order."

He just looked at her. "Would I be correct in assuming that this order originated from me?" he snapped.

Just then the bridge doors opened and Tuvok stepped out of the turbolift, dressed in a fluorescent shirt in red, green, and orange swirls. Chakotay briefly closed his eyes.

Kathryn slumped over trying desperately not to laugh too loudly. A choked snigger was heard from the pilot’s seat. Tuvok looked around at the entire bridge crew all dressed in their uniforms, all trying to hide their laughter and he sighed. His ears went green at the tips and his gaze narrowed in on Chakotay. "Permission to retire for a moment, Captain?"

"Dear me, Tuvok, didn’t you receive the memo postponing the Hawaiian Shirt Day until next week? Oh well, there isn’t really time now so I guess you will have to wait until the end of your shift."



Chakotay walked down the corridor towards his office. He heard his name being called and turned to face the security officer.

"Commander, I have been hearing rumours about a hit list."

Mentally Chakotay fought a brief battle with himself, but the warrior in him won out. He gave Tuvok a menacing look. "A hit list against a former Maquis is not a good idea."

Tuvok stared impassively back at him. Chakotay started to walk away but after three or four steps he half turned. "Tuvok, try tracing the memo before your next training day."


The End



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